"It" being senior year. Yeah.
Other than it being a huge deal, it's really . . . nothing. British Lit=piece of cake. Really, really, really yummy cake. Spanish=switching languages mid-high school career probably isn't smart, but it makes more sense than the French I was never going to use. And, switching from French to Spanish isn't that bad, switch a few pronunciations and gender-specific nouns and you're good to go. Geometry=*yawn*. End of story. And if physics is as fun this year as chemistry was last year, then no biggie.
So the actual actions of senior year aren't a big deal.
What is is the general idea of it. Ella, high school senior. Something about that . . . insanity!! And it might help if I had the FIRST idea, WHATSOEVER what happens after graduation. Mleh.
And then there's the whole thing of spending every day with my head in books again. Miss math one day, double up the next. Try to have English done before the kids are ready for lunch in front of the television (. . . Dick Van Dyke show this week . . . ugh.) Try to get my head around algebra problems. The same algebra problems as four months ago, coincidentally. I didn't quite finish my text book last year, so I'm stuck doing them. Again. Now. I'm starting to wonder if this is how Frodo felt when he came back to the Shire. "It doesn't matter that you been on adventures and saved the world and met elves and dwarves and men and wizards. Live in your house. Eat cheese, and smoked meats. Go down to the pub. Eat chips, watch telly." Whoops. Sorry. Slipped into Doctor Who there a bit. But anyway. I went halfway across the country this summer. I got a taste of how I want to live. I met a ministry that is . . . incredible. That I'm called to. I ministered to little Spanish-speaking children in apartment complexes in Texas. I met some of the . . . most incredible people on the planet. I co-directed a county-wide dance camp, twenty-five students, four teachers, five days. I lead Bible studies about God's love with two different age groups . . . and learned more than I taught. I got up at six o'clock every morning with Corinne (who stayed with us through the camp) to study God's word together. Girls (and their parents) from other churches who are fighting to get dance groups established were encouraged and equipped. And the Friday night presentation? Was beyond amazing. Exhilarating. The girls did awesome, I was sooo proud of them. All of the presentations came together beautifully, and you could really see how much they had learned over the course of the week. And, me and Joy's "secret side-goal" happened too. See, where we live, racial unity really isn't something that happens a lot. I'm trying to be delicate, please don't misunderstand me or be offended. As for myself personally, I think racial prejudice is disgusting. Vomitous. But it exists, on both sides, where I come from. And that week? Girls of all colors came together on even ground, and had a great time together. And their parents all came out Friday night to see what they had learned. Our sanctuary was full, and multicultural. It was beautiful. And it confirms my long-held belief, that the way to fix the problems of this world is to look to, to prevent them in, the next generation. Get the kids, and the adults will follow.
I've watched God do truly amazing things this summer.
And now I'm sitting on my couch. Reading Beowulf. Doing Algebra. I concede with my intellect that these things are important. But that doesn't mean I'm not overwhelmingly bored.
God's working on me, though. This morning, he really convicted me. That this year, this time, is where He has called me NOW. Only He knows what He has for the future, but it's my job to live for Him here and now. Which means doing algebra, physics, and youth group on Wednesdays, cheerfully as though for the Lord.
Dear readers, wish me luck.